Letter to the Bank Manager #82 (Whilst Basking In Your Rays)

ATTENTION:
Mr. John Bullrider, MBA etc.
Personal Bank Manager
Mine’s Eye Bank

Dear Mr. Bullrider,

Recently you offered, by phone, to send me a package sure to aid me in the ongoing fight against account hacking, and the loss of one's personal information to fraudsters and the like. Naturally I assume that as my money is in your capable hands these are issues that need not concern me. You can only imagine how shocked I was when told this service was free for thirty days after which point a fee would be added to any other monthly charges I might incur.  I brushed it off saying thanks but no thanks if you get my drift. As my beloved BM I remain confident you will apply your steady, guiding principles to the practice of managing and protecting my money in such a way as to benefit not only myself, but also my dependents and my community.
 
This trust is, I hope, fully justified. Ours is, in the end, a co-dependent relationship as I am sure is slowly becoming apparent—even to you.

Yours most sincerely,


Art O’Connor  

PS—This is a short letter! It's high time I learned to Twitter.