Letters to the Bouncy Banker...

Letters to the Bouncy Banker...
...from a struggling artiste.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

The Art of Self-Expression in 360º

How to say it all using all means at one's disposal
This blog has been on hiatus. I'm not sure where to take it. 
I hoped time and distance might provide a new perspective. 
I keep returning to thoughts on satirists who stop satirizing (Tom Lehrer for example) because they can no longer see the funny side in what they observe. Satire is anger expressed with humor i.e. not so funny one almost forgives the object of one's wrath but funny enough to keep the reader reading. 
My letters to the Bouncy and ever so elusive Bank Manager will continue but sporadically.  I don't want to be angry.

Art remains elusive as well but nonetheless is at the core of this blog. I could as well have called it Art and Life wherein an artist struggles to balance:
His need to create with his urge to destroy, 
His roles as father/husband, home owner (the most onerous-see previous entry), and earner/worker (I don't have a bad job as jobs go but it is part-time and with property taxes that are the highest in the nation still totally treadmillish). 

The life dream is hard to chase when debt hovers over one so menacingly. Instead of blogging and PAINTING shouldn't I be: 
Chasing after a business degree? 
Getting my realtor's licence? 
Climbing in to finance? 
Going where the money is? 
Selling my body?
Selling my soul?
Selling secrets to the Russians even though it is all there on Google? Hey! If they'll pay for it why not? My secrets are very dull but I am willing to sell them and I'm pretty cheap.
I remember once, with my old room-mate and dear friend, Steve, standing over a wood burner in the kitchen of his loft in Bed Stuy, both of us wearing fingerless gloves. We were warming our chilled fingers before heading back into our studios to continue the arduous, possibly absurd task of making our art. We looked at each other mournfully and chatted about how, if we had any sense, we'd have worked on Wall Street. Then we both burst out laughing. 

We would've been miserable.
Nothing has changed.
I'm still broke.
I'm still making art. 
I still get distressed by the ills of the world.
I'm currently distressed by: 
Fox News (never watch it but knowing it is there is enough to give me ulcers)
Right Wing bloggers who lie with impunity,
Massively paid Lobbyists,
Stalling on climate and new energy legislation, 
Loopholes for banks, car dealerships/mortgage brokers/financial engineers (who came up with that one?)
The cost of applying for Art competitions (I'd love to get my art out there but for goodness sake!)
The lack of jobs out there for High School kids,
The lack of vision,
The lack of vision,
The lack of vision.

I'll keep fumbling in the dark for the light switch.

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