ART AND THE BOUNCY BANKER: Letter to the Bank #9

The Bruxist Collective's take on Art and (as Alfred Jarry might put it) P'finance.

A numerically dyslexic artist (and reluctant consumer) shares his dearth of financial wisdom and resulting frustrations with his Bank Manager. Read personal letters from the elusive Art to his even more elusive Bank Manager. See a comic rendition of a Day In The Life Of The Bouncy Banker. Art struggles to make sense of the senseless as the Authorities of Finance wobble but never quite fall down. Full of hot air they float above it all! When they bounce it is with impunity! Why are there no Remorseful Bankers? Can Art and Finance ever coexist? Do you have a Blue Chip on your shoulder?

When bankers get together they talk about Art. When artists get together they talk about money. Oscar Wilde

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Letter to the Bank #9

Dear Bank,

I’ve put my current infrastructure project on hold. Though only a modest slice of the Economic Stimulus package would get it up and running I fear, for now, those extra hands I would willingly have put to work, will remain idle. Instead of helping me paint the basement the kids will have to content themselves with whiling away their valuable time on their Wiis and I-pods, their Gameboys and Webkinz. Until I can once again provide them with employment appropriate to their skill level and the commensurate pay rate, their talents will remain underutilized. For now a trip to the movies is out of the question. An adult ticket is at least $12 and by the time the whole family has been paid the hole in my pocket would at minimum be fifty big ones big! In this economy that is a big hole to fill!

So for now we are laying low. That said we still do our bit to stimulate the economy! I admit I cut my own hair the other day but honestly you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t! Look at poor John Edwards who was excoriated for getting a $300 haircut! Make up your minds! Do you want us to be thrifty or not?

My figuring is this: As required expenditures continue apace we are thus continuing to consume. We continue to pay out for guitar lessons, after school programs and necessary deposits for Summer Camp (forbid I take time off work to be with my kids), and so it is that we satisfy the SPEND lobby. Meanwhile we are putting wants and desires on hold so satisfying the need for THRIFT, for belt-tightening. Sot it is that despite limited resources we continue to pump up the economy.

I’d greatly appreciate it if you, for one, stopped bashing me for trying to not dig myself deeper into debt. If I am still contributing to the economy and paying my taxes I’m surely doing my bit. The question occurs to me: Are you, the bank, doing yours?

Yours sincerely and possibly a little distant,

K

PS if I spend and save does that make me a spendthrift? What do you think? Actually what do you think about anything? You really haven’t told me yet.