ART AND THE BOUNCY BANKER: Letter to the Bank #7

The Bruxist Collective's take on Art and (as Alfred Jarry might put it) P'finance.

A numerically dyslexic artist (and reluctant consumer) shares his dearth of financial wisdom and resulting frustrations with his Bank Manager. Read personal letters from the elusive Art to his even more elusive Bank Manager. See a comic rendition of a Day In The Life Of The Bouncy Banker. Art struggles to make sense of the senseless as the Authorities of Finance wobble but never quite fall down. Full of hot air they float above it all! When they bounce it is with impunity! Why are there no Remorseful Bankers? Can Art and Finance ever coexist? Do you have a Blue Chip on your shoulder?

When bankers get together they talk about Art. When artists get together they talk about money. Oscar Wilde

Monday, February 9, 2009

Letter to the Bank #7

Dear Bank,

You certainly cannot accuse me of failure to persist. I am confident that eventually we will both see the light and will consequently come to a mutually satisfying arrangement. You know and I know it would do neither of us any good if I should decide to simply walk away from my obligations. You would never do that I’m sure. That said I realize your obligations keep changing. I have to say it is sometimes hard to keep up. Who defines what our obligations are? Who decides to up the interest rate or deny credit or default on debt? I wish they, whoever they are, would keep things simple. Personally I have reached a point of paralysis.

Ah well. At least my house is still standing! Oh and I passed your bank the other day and noticed that it, to, was standing tall and proud, despite the wreckage of empty shops, and foreclosed businesses lying like flotsam at its feet.

Did you know that the number 99, or any number that ends in 9, has the effect of lulling people into spending more? Maybe you should put 99 at the end of all the numbers you send me and I’ll magically feel that I owe you less than I thought, am therefore rich, and should go buy anything ending in the number 99. So there’s a tip for you. Who says you cannot get anything for free! What is more if you keep things simple I might just go ahead and increase my debt!

Yours sincerely,

K

PS You guys are good at Numerology. Do you have any tips for me?

PPS Suddenly I am a bit concerned about offending someone by stealing their photos off the web and having them attempt to sue me for my paltry assets so I am recycling an image from The Bruxist Collective, an extraordinary outfit who have been kind enough to permit my using some of their brilliant and underappreciated artwork for this project. Oh. Now I suppose I should come up with a name...or an acronym. Look for it in a later missive.